Executive Decisions And Promotional Requirements
by VisualIDentificationZeta
Summary: SUMMARY: Harm is being promoted, but what if he doesn't meet all the requirements? It's time for the General to take matters in his own hands and make sure the new Captain actually becomes a Captain. Parody, crack!fic, not meant to be taken seriously.
1. The Announcement

TITLE: Executive Decisions And Promotional Requirements

AUTHOR: Vid Z.

PAIRING: not HM

TIMELINE: begins at the end of Dream Team

DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc of the TV show JAG are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author of this fic. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

AUTHOR'S NOTES: as written in the summary this is a crack fic, a parody, not meant to be taken seriously. If some over-tense reader takes it seriously and then complain or even flame they'll be publicly branded of being the village idiot. I'm making fun of every canon character here, they're all OOC, so please don't see ghosts where they're not, like imagining I'm bashing your fav character while exulting the other, they're all being mocked.

SUMMARY: Harm is being promoted, but what if he doesn't meet all the requirements? It's time for the General to take matters in his own hands and make sure the new Captain actually becomes a Captain. Parody, crack!fic, not meant to be taken seriously.

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"Congratulations, Captain Rabb, frocking has been authorized." the General said with a smile to a shell-shocked Harm.

"Now to the next order of business for you, Captain." Cresswell put some papers down and stepped over to the door, opened them and let in a group of female staff. The staff already in the room shared confused glances while Vukovich just salivated, leering at the young women who just looked at him in disgust.

"As you know, with a Captain's positions come many social obligations, which fall under the Captain's wife's domain. Whom you don't have." He sent a stern, chastising, even disappointed look at Harm for his abysmal private life and for being a complete failure in relationships. After all, having a wife was a Captain's obligation to the Navy. Who else will give birth to future recruits, handle social engagements, focus on his career while he focuses on the good of the Navy? Harm had failed himself and had failed the Navy.

When the General noticed Harm was about to protest he raised his hand, silencing him. "Since you've proven yourself utterly incapable of finding a wife by yourself in the last 41 years of your life I'm taking it upon myself to choose one for you..." Harm's ear tips reddened, he couldn't believe the direction this was taking. "A Captain needs a wife who will fulfill all those social obligations, organize parties, lead the Officers Wives club on the base,... Imagine them without a leader to control them..." the General visibly shuddered in horror at that thought.

Harm finally saw his chance to interrupt. This was a catastrophe, the General choosing a wife for him! "Sir!" But the General shot him a look that clearly said 'Be quiet, or you'll become a Seaman instead of a Captain.'

Harm subsided, trying to remember if the General had to go through a psych eval before being chosen for this spot. Perhaps he was overdue for one...

"So, I've taken it upon myself to choose the perfect lady for you, Captain. These past few weeks a covert campaigning has been going on in this office. Since the world finding out you had to be given a wife by the Navy to succeed in getting one would be detrimental to your reputation and position as a Captain, which meant it would be detrimental to the Navy as well, these elections were top secret and limited only to the unmarried female staff of this base, who were sworn to keep it a secret under a severe punishment. Which goes for you too." he glared at the already seated staff.

Harm groaned, burying his face in his hands. Now he knew the reason for all those considering and sometimes lustful looks the women on the base had been giving him these past few months, from 19 year old Sea(wo)men upward. Yup, his reputation was definitely shot to hell. Imagine if Keeter hears about this...

Harm would never live it down. Of course, only if Keeter didn't suffocate from the laughter that would take him over at hearing the news.

The General, unaware and even had he known of Harm's inner turmoil wouldn't have cared, continued.

"There are several conditions that must be met for the applicant to receive this billet however. First, each applicant must be aware that for this position they need resign from the Navy/Marines."

That stopped Mac, who'd been about to protest at not having been included in these elections, cold and she fell silent. 'Hold on! Give up the Marines? For Harm? For any man?' In her mind she imagined a scale. On one side was Harm and on the other her career. The few years she had left of it before her 20 were up. She needed only half a second to decide. 'No way!' she quickly sat down and was quiet for the rest of the meeting, ignoring that she'd accepted Brumby's sacrifice of his career without blinking and had even demanded the same sacrifice from Harm on USS Guadalcanal and had then proceeded to throw it into his face in Paraguay when he'd actually done as she'd wanted and thrown away his career for her.

"Second. The Captain and his wife will spend the next several years in London, the so-called Rain Country. Where it rains. A lot." He finished somewhat lamely, realizing that wasn't actually that bad a reference. Great Britain was a beautiful and diverse place, rich with history and natural wonders, having been THE world power and the strongest naval power for centuries, after all. Just thank god the american personnel stationed there didn't have to pay british taxes...

"Third. The job requires knowledge of bureaucracy, protocol, good manners and good organizatory skills. The position of a Captain's wife is a career."

"Fourth. The applicant must be young enough to be able to get pregnant and give birth without any complications. The good of the Navy must be observed at all times and providing the Navy with quality recruits is just another way."

Cresswell then looked around at all the eager faces, some of whom were leering at Harm and obviously thinking of all the things that they could do with him if they were elected to be his wife. Meanwhile the subject of contention was looking increasingly despairing over his situation and even frightful at the hungry and scorching looks sent his way. Looking around fearfully he slowly sank down in his chair until only his wide eyes and his hair was seen over the table top.

Biffy nodded. "Okay, then. Now to explain what such a position will entail. As I've already said, the position of a Captain's wife is a full-time career, with her efforts aimed at furthering her husband's career and helping him rise higher up the ranks. With his rising through the society she raises herself as well. The Captain's wife is also the Head of the Officers Wives Club of the command and is also the one to organize any and all parties and official functions on the base. She's a role model to other wives and only the highest standards are expected of her."

Harm interrupted again, earning himself a glare. "Sir, I really don't think this is necessary."

"But it is, Captain. You'll be taking over an important command and thus you are required to have a wife. Especially if you want further promotions... promotions board will promote to flag officers married ones over the unmarried. And since the one you hoped to enter the matrimonial state with sometime in the future has just chosen her career and other men over you..." he glanced in Mac's direction meaningfully, then turned it into a glare when he looked from her to Vukovich and back, having found out the younger man's illegal actions that had been condoned by the LtCol. He would be dealing with them soon, he couldn't have lawyers cheating in court by paying actors to play someone and commit perjury... "... we have to look elsewhere for a candidate. Besides, look at all these fine young women, Captain, there isn't a one among them any sane man would reject."

Well, Harm definitely had to give the man, he was right. None of them could ever be classed as dumb, at HQ were some of the most intelligent and smart women of JAG. Only the best officers and enlisted, men and women, received the honor to work at HQ.

'Well, most of the time' thought Harm 'cause there _are _exceptions...'

Weight and fitness standards, coupled with fitness quals every 6 months, also meant that they were quite fit and attractive too. So, there was no danger of not finding any of them desirable, physically attractive.

BUT what matters most isn't how a person looks, but their personality, their character and this was what Harm had fears about. He still loved Mac, he just didn't like her anymore. He hadn't been able to really like her for years. And a close relationship with her, especially marriage, would've been hell because of how unpleasant her personality had become over the last few years.

Still, if the General wouldn't have stepped in Harm would've probably proposed to Mac. Why? Because he wouldn't have been able to accept the fact that he'd sunk 8 years and countless sacrifices, among them other relationships, even his career and flight status, into this woman and this relationship for nothing. And during the times he was truthful to himself he'd acknowledge that the current Mac was not the Mac he'd fallen in love with years ago, that Mac was dead and had been replaced by a Mac he did not recognize nor like, and a relationship between them would never have worked.

Therefore, what if he got assigned a wife who's character he didn't like? It's not like he could just give her back and in the General's mind there was obviously no chance of a divorce...

"I've received a lot of applications during these past few weeks and since we couldn't fit them all into this small room only the bullpen staff were allowed to attend this briefing. It was a tough choice, one that took me days to decide. Who is the right one for you and the Navy? Well, now is the time to find out."

The General stopped for dramatic effect, looked around and saw everyone on the edge of their seat, then spoke up. "And the new Captain's wife is..."

THE END

PS: any suggestions for the wife?

REVIEW!


	2. HarmOther

Wow, I never expected so many reviews for a fic I considered pretty much pointless and stupid, one of my worst ones.

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Replies to the reviewers to whom I couldn't reply privately:

**camile:** I once just briefly considered pairing Harm up with a civilian, but quickly discarded it and never went back. It just wouldn't work, the Navy is too much a part of him and a civilian wouldn't be able to understand that. It's a problem that many of service members have to face. Harm's failed relationships with civilian women give enough credence to this theory that the only women I'll pair him up with will be military, who can understand him and understand everything that comes with being in the Navy, something a civilian woman would never be fully able to.

**Jenn R:** I'm sorry, but for that kind of fics you've come to the wrong address. I don't write Harm/Mac, would never want to do something as cruel to Harm as pairing him up with Mac, I namely don't hate the guy, and the only Harm/Mac fics you will find on my profile page are old and were written only as a way of getting my feet wet in the fanfiction writing world.

**anon**: hey, you're back! It's been a while, good to see you again. Thanks for the review.

**winjan**: Hey, you're back too! Good to see you again, thanks for the review!

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For the record, this is where the fun stops, this part is more serious and no longer a parody. It's a window a few years into the future to see how Harm and his wife are doing and to answer your question who she is.

I loved your reviews, please keep them coming!

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5 YEARS LATER

"You know, I'm really glad the crazy old coot chose _you _to be my wife." Admiral Harmon Rabb Jr. gazed at his lady as they prepared for his Change of Command Ceremony with which he would formally take over as the new Judge Advocate General.

"Hmmm, why is that?" she asked coyly.

"There were all those young sexy women who only wanted me for my body and were planning on doing unspeakable things to it." he mock shuddered.

"Who says I wasn't one of them?" she raised an elegant eyebrow, smirking, then sent a scorching look up and down his body.

"You were?" he asked surprised.

She smirked again and moved seductively over to him, slinging her arms over his shoulders and, with her fingers tangled into his hair, pulled his face down close to hers.

"Of course." she breathed sexily. "You have a damn hot body. Only a completely oblivious woman wouldn't notice it and not have designs on it."

Amused she noticed his ear-tips redden, the tell-tale sign she'd learned over the years, and ran a teasing nail down his earlobe. Raising on her toes she nibbled on his neck and felt the shiver go through his body.

"Don't start anything you're not prepared to finish." she could feel the words rumble through his chest even before his husky growl could be heard, she was so tightly plastered over him.

Still nibbling she breathed into his ear. "Who says I'm not?"

Then stepping away so quickly Harm shivered from the cold that suddenly replaced her warmth, she smirked. "But, as much as I would love a quickie right now against the wall, we don't have time even for that. And I'm not willing to risk staining either of our clothes."

"Tease." he muttered, receiving an evil grin in return.

"I'm not a tease as long as I intend to go through with it." she sing-songed primly. "And I DO intend to put out as soon as we get back home."

He considered this and ordered. "Then let's finish getting ready. The sooner we're done there the sooner we can get back home."

As they left the bedroom to check whether the kids were ready yet, Harm quickly grabbed and squeezed her tight, muscular ass, eliciting a squeal of surprise from her. Leaning closer he nibbled on her neck, growling. "And when we come back home and the kids are put to sleep, then I fully expect you to be naked and ready on the bed, waiting to put out, Monica Rabb."

Enjoying his amorous attentions the former Public Relations officer's Assistant, former Ensign Monica Peters, just purred. "As you wish, Mr Rabb."

Then disengaging herself from her husband she went to check on their brood, leaving Harm to collect himself.

Watching the sexy slim hips of her unnaturally hot, slim and tall body sway as she walked away from him, Harm asked himself how he got this lucky, to have 2 great kids and such a hot, young wife, who was more than willing to indulge every fantasy he had, complimenting them with her own, and was an amazing wife and mother to boot. Even before the General had chosen her he'd always somehow known she would make a fantastic wife and mother to some extremely lucky bastard's children and he was glad _he _ was that lucky bastard.

Smiling he just shrugged and decided to stop thinking it through and just enjoy it for the rest of his life.

Besides, of course, sending a Thank-you card to the very-soon-to-be-a-retired-General, Cresswell, like he did every year...

That crazy old man definitely deserved it...

THE END

This fic was actually meant from the start on as a Harm/Other fic, but I wrote myself into a corner... only Jennifer was fulfilling all the conditions for the wife. I love HJ, it was my start into the world of fanfiction, but I wanted to try something new. But it is a fact that until the minute before I posted this fic I didn't know who I would give to Harm for his wife, whether Jen, Meg or if I could somehow write in an OC. With a lot of thinking I actually managed to come up with a candidate that actually fulfilled the conditions... only a PR person does have a grasp of protocol and other such things in the Navy as the JAG's yeoman.

But, if anyone wants it, I can write an alternate ending with Jen being his wife... Let me know.

Body-wise I modeled Monica after an extremely hot woman I saw at the gas station when I was filling up my bike a moth ago. Hot damn, I didn't even know legs so long or a butt so tight or a waist so slim or a body so slim and graceful and a face so lovely can actually exist in one package, especially in my podunk little city, she was someone you would sooner expect to see in a fashion metropolis, being a highest-paid super-model. And she was even dressed pretty good - stretch jeans (not the hip-huggers), high boots,... and I felt really inadequate in the old jeans I use for riding my bike - I wasn't even in my full leathers. :( Definitely not something that would give me enough self-confidence to make a move. Oh well, at least I can console myself that perhaps she was a self-centered witch, as were most of the really beautiful women I knew, it's a 50-50 chance she's not, but I can still console myself... Right?

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	3. Alternate HarmJen Ending

Okay, it took a long time for this to be posted, but the main thing is that it's finally here, right?

Thank you for all your lovely reviews for the previous chapters and I hope you will be as generous for this chapter.

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_BY POPULAR REQUEST: ALTERNATE HARM/JEN VERSION_

Captain Harmon Rabb Jr. stood in the doorway of the bedroom observing the scene with a content smile upon his handsome face. At 45 he was still handsome and, in the opinion of his wife, he was getting even more handsome with age, like old wine, but he knew that the reason he was still so youthful was his family and especially having a younger wife. His wife... When they'd gotten together, mere minutes before getting married, he'd thought she'd make him feel even more his age, but had been pleasantly surprised by just the opposite; her youthfulness, enthusiasm and optimism rubbed off on him.

Had anyone asked him years before if he'd ever have a wife and family he would've just shaken his head sadly and evaded more questions, all too aware of the pain in his heart that rose up every time he thought of the fact he'd never have this kind of happiness.

"Love you, Mommy." the small child, snuggled deeply into the fluffy blankets and sheets of the small bed whispered as he drifted off to sleep.

"I love you too, sweetheart." Jennifer Rabb, wife, mother, Captain's wife and housewife by own choice; whispered tenderly and brushed a lock of dark hair away from the small face.

What felt like the millionth time in the past 3,5 years Harm felt a squeezing sensation in his heart whenever he was a witness to his wife's loving, tender nature express itself. In three and a half years of their marriage he'd seen it more times than he could count. In fact he had tried counting, but had to give it up at the end of the first week because he could no longer keep up. The first time he'd ever seen it was with AJ Roberts 7 years ago and the first time as her significant other had been just hours after their wedding on that fateful day in May 2005.

The General had obviously been organizing the whole thing for weeks, because it had taken less than half an hour for the whole procession to be transferred into one of the court-rooms, where Harm's and Jen's wedding had then taken place. Hell, the man of the hour had even made sure Trish and Frank were there to see him put on the ball and chain. His mother had cried a river that day, while Frank had just been smiling that small, proud smile of his, the smile only a true father has when he's proud of his son. The smile had then only widened when Harm had asked him to be his best man, while Jen had asked Trish to be her Maid of Honor, having met Harm's mother the previous summer and becoming close friends with her.

That was when Harm had first seen that look of tenderness, love and caring turned on him, no walls and no curtains, her emotions on show because she'd just been too overwhelmed to hold them in.

Jennifer Coates... no, that's wrong... Jennifer Rabb, had always been a gentle, calm, warm, funny, fun, loving and generous person, it had never been anything she'd tried to hide or cover-up. It's amazing just how different she was from all other women he'd been involved with with the exception of Diane, especially compared to those self-centered ones: Renee, Mac and Jordan.

Jen's gentle, calm, caring nature had always appealed to him, from the start, knowing that only a strong personality underneath that calm, steady self could sustain it. Even though she was such a giving person Jen was no push-over.

Even before they'd gotten married Harm had known Jen would've made a fantastic mother one day. She had strong maternal instincts and had had to be giving off a presence, because children had just flocked to her, even with how young she'd been. He'd seen confirmation of that belief in the first week he knew her, the way she'd interacted with Little AJ and the way she'd effortlessly soothed the boy's temper tantrum that Christmas.

During her cohabitation with Mattie her maternal instinct was getting confused, she was young enough to be in more of an older-sister role, but by practically sharing custody of Mattie with Harm she was basically in the mother role to Harm's father role and Mattie's child role.

That confusion had gone on for over a year until it had been resolved by her marriage to Harm and with them taking custody of Mattie together, later adopting her, with which Jen had officially become Mattie's mother, disbanding her older-sister-role and letting the mother role take over completely.

They'd agreed that Jen would stay in the States with Mattie until the girl could be transferred to London, while Harm had had to leave for the UK immediately to take over his new command. He'd been hesitant and guilt-ridden at leaving the girl at the time she needed him most and also leaving Jen to deal with residual paperwork for custody and her resignation from the Navy on her own, but there had been no other choice. Thankfully they had managed to get both of their apartments packed before the crucial day and, while Harm had taken a civilian flight, their stuff, along with the Corvette had crossed the pond at the same time. On Harm's advice Jen had sold her own unreliable car to the breakers' yard after their wedding as it was nothing but a liability and Harm had given her the Lexus to use until she and Mattie would join him in London, with the Lexus following them on a military cargo flight. He had already decided to sign the Lexus over to her the first chance he'd get.

By the time it had been time for Harm to leave he could see Jen's maternal and protective instincts had already kicked in with regards to Mattie and he had actually heard a nurse make a comment about how young Jen must've been when she'd given birth to her 'daughter', so much like a true mother she had already been. Mattie, starved for a female role model in her life and maternal affection, had not complained over the new arrangement, though it had taken a few days before she'd gotten used to the fact that Jen was no longer her older sister, but her mother.

However one of the biggest shocks of those days had been when Jen had dropped him off at the airport and given him a hesitant, shy kiss on his lips in full view of everyone at the terminal. After the initial surprise Harm had started to return her kiss when she broke away. Her expressive eyes had already been telling the truth, but she had still screwed up enough courage to whisper to Harm to take care of himself, she and Mattie would be reunited with him soon and that she, Jen, loved him. Then she'd turned around and quickly left.

Needless to say Harm had had much to think about during the following weeks and after a lot of introspection he'd realized he didn't mind Jen feeling that way about him and that if he let himself, he'd fall in love with her pretty easily. It hadn't taken him long to decide that the future they could have together, if he let himself love her, was well worth it. Why have a business marriage if you can have a marriage filled with love and happiness? So, when Jen and Mattie had finally made it to the UK Harm had met them at the airport and had given Jen a welcome she would not forget for the rest of her life - it had taken her a few minutes before she'd slowed down her heartbeat and gotten her breath back and another half hour before her lips and tongue had stopped tingling.

An unconscious smile over the memories lingered on Harm's lips as he came back to the present.

Pulling the blanket up to the small boy's chin Jen tucked him in, pressed a loving kiss to his forehead, then turned to rise.

Harm moved quickly to her and, somehow just knowing he was there, Jen reached out and accepted the hand he offered her. He pulled her up easily and steadied her when she had a dizzy spell from sitting too long.

Quietly they moved out of the room and turned the light off, closing the door.

Jen snuggled into Harm's strong embrace, his long arms easily enfolding her into him. One hand gently holding onto his waist, she nuzzled her face into his chest, then pressed her ear against it to listen to his heart beat, which never failed to fill her with a sense of security only he could give her.

"I already tucked Lara in." Harm whispered.

"Thanks." she murmured lazily "Come on, let's go to bed. I can already feel in my breasts she'll wake up in about an hour." looking up at him with hodded, smokey eyes she smirked "Think an hour is enough?"

Harm pretended to think about it "It'll be tight, but I think we can pull through."

Her smile was saucy and seductive "Then show me what you can do, Mr Rabb."

"As you wish, Mrs Rabb." Harm growled and took her lips passionately.

Closing their bedroom door behind them Harm had only one thought before he lost himself in the arms of the woman he loved more than his own life.

Sometimes Executive Decisions are not that bad at all. And sometimes, coupled with Promotional Requirements, they can be the best thing that can happen to a person. It sure was true for him...

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	4. General's Vengeance, part 1 of 2

My deepest thanks to all of your for your support and understanding. If any of you are reading my SG-1 stories as well then you know I'm getting back to writing. Those 2 hours of self-pity were over the same day, then got on with life, and even though I worked the whole previous week on it I **still** haven't been able to finish the new ONE chapter. Thing is, I have two halves of it written, but have absolutely no clue whatsoever as to how to glue them together in a way that wouldn't come out looking unnatural and forced.

Looking for some inspiration I went to re-read my old stories and when I was reading the first chapter of this crack fic and came across a specific sentence my evil, evil mind had a great idea for a joke to play on Harm. This one's style of writing and style of Harm's future/marriage is different from the other two.

So this is it. Let me know what you think of it and if you want it to continue (that's what reviews are for hint hint *g*).

X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X - the next "upgrade" ff. net will make will probably make ALL the text disappear in stories, considering what the filters are deleting already, even page breaks. Okay, for real now:

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"Here you go." Maya said, handing Harm a glass to dry.

"Thanks." he replied, taking the glass from her small hand while trying to ignore the weirdness of having such a young woman for his wife.

True, she was quite obviously an adult and also more mature than most women her age, but, dear god, she was only four years older than Mattie!

One of these days he was gonna snap.

He was gonna snap and he was gonna go back to DC and throttle that smug bastard of a General. Seriously, where did the old bastard lose his brains when he decided to give Harm a child bride? Okay, she was definitely not a kid anymore, but she was definitely nowhere near Harm's age.

It's just somehow wrong to have a wife only a few years older than your former ward.

It wasn't doing just the best for his reputation either. Either he was on the receiving end of conspiratorial, lecherous winks or frowns of disapproval and the worst thing was that when he'd been introduced to the Queen, Maya had been mistaken for his daughter and he'd been inquired at to where was his wife, considering she'd been invited as well!!!

He knew Maya wasn't having it easy as well, but couldn't do anything about it even though he wanted to, he simply couldn't change other people's ideas and belief systems, nor could he stop them from being jealous or plain vicious.

It was all some cruel joke of the General's, he was sure of it, what he wasn't sure, however, was what he'd done to deserve it. He namely couldn't remember anything that would warrant such a payback.

And as much as he'd come to care for the young woman who was trapped into this charade with him, he was himself after all so he couldn't live for a year with someone without coming to care for them, he was completely honest with himself over the fact that Maya was not the best fit for the role of a Captain's wife.

She namely fit only one of the requirements the General had listed at that oh-so-memorable meeting as she hadn't had any extensive experience with bureaucracy, protocol or ways around them at the time they'd married, having been in the Navy for only 7 months, the only condition she did fulfill was that she was young. Young enough to give birth to many future recruits as the General had put it. For such an intelligent man the General had completely overseen the huge hole in his reasoning, a hole Harm had spotted immediately: that with her being too young for Harm no kids would most probably come from their marriage.

For the past 12 months he'd been asking himself what had in the first place gotten into the 19 year old girl's head for her to vie for the job of being the wife to a man old enough to be her father. Dear god, her father... had that meeting been utterly and inexplicably painful, in more ways than one.

He was brutally honest with himself that both himself and Maya had handled breaking the news to her parents badly, Harm for chickening out and letting Maya do the talking and Maya for not explaining first, but just blurting out that she'd left the Navy and they'd gotten married. Harm didn't begrudge her father the punch the man had thrown at him, Harm would've reacted the same way had his daughter, his baby girl just fresh out of high school, come to him to tell him she was giving up the career she'd started only months before and was supposed to last for years just so she could marry an older man... Hell, if that was the case, a punch would've been the least Harm would've done to the guy. The natural assumption Mitchell Blake had taken was that Harm had had an affair with Maya, thus as an officer taking advantage of a young, impressionable enlisted, which Blake, a former Army grunt from 'Nam, knew full well was prohibited by UCMJ, and would most probably leave her within a few years. That assumption had of course led to the belief that not only had Harm taken advantage of a younger enlisted, but had also knocked her up and that was why Maya had been _forced _to leave the Navy and had not done so on her own.

As soon as Maya had stopped the bleeding coming from Harm's split lip, they'd set the record straight.

Not that either of her parents had believed their explanation of the events, of course. When Harm tried to explain that it had actually been the JAG's idea Mitchell's only reaction had been a disdainful snort before he'd tried charging at Harm again. Mitchell and his wife, Elaine, had only believed the two newlyweds after they'd acquired the telephone number for JAG HQ from it's website (they didn't trust either of the two newlyweds not to give them a number of a friend who would play the part of the JAG) and spoken directly to the General (an act that had earned Harm a dressing down by the afore-mentioned pissed-off head-honcho-Jarhead).

And when Maya had then broken the news that she would be leaving for another continent the next day because of Harm... well... Harm was no coward, but by the way his father-in-law's (who was only 13 years older than Harm) index finger had spasmed he'd been sure the man's old reflexes from Nam, namely the ones of pulling the trigger on the M16A1 in the presence of an enemy, were kicking in and it was a good thing for Harm Mitchell had no firearm in hand. The fact that Maya's 7 and 5 years older sisters hadn't been hiding their approval of Harm's body hadn't made their father any less welcoming to his new son-in-law.

Through this, erm, pleasant meeting with the in-laws Harm had had one of his old theories confirmed once again.

Contrary to the much-loved-and-repeated popular myth, a female is nowhere near as dangerous as a male defending his family, especially when his family is made up of only females. Males are a great deal stronger, can do a lot more damage, protectiveness is written in their DNA, besides the fact that most of them have some experience with fighting even if with youthful brawls. Every bit of that had come out in his father-in-law's reaction and Harm even believed the older man had been holding back because of their audience/witnesses.

He certainly wasn't looking forward to seeing Mitchell again in a few months when he and Maya would be going back to the States to visit both their families.

Hopefully until then Maya would quit the trend she'd started 2 months ago of walking around the house in those cotton, figure-flattering sweat pants (or were they yoga pants? Harm wasn't really sure of the distinction) and tank tops that showed her toned midriff and a lot of cleavage. Okay, so it wasn't to the point where it was indecent and where Harm would have to talk to her about, but it was still a bit uncomfortable for him. And distracting. She was still keeping in shape, perhaps a legacy from basic training and Navy's weight and fitness standards, perhaps not, which was made worse by them exercising together and her always wearing Spandex shorts together with thin cotton T-shirts that plastered to her body when soaked with sweat. She was slowly driving him crazy, intentionally or not, and he didn't know whether hormonally crazy or just plain crazy.

Okay, so it was his own fault for being a little high strung sexually, since he'd had plenty of opportunities to get laid and take care of that during his single years before he'd gotten married by his CO. As if her attire wasn't bad enough she'd found some really nice perfume and everytime he was within 4 feet of her he could smell it and it drew him in like a moth. Then there was the occasional, accidental full-body brush that didn't help matters or when she came out of the shower in only a large towel, skin pinkish from the hot water and smelling so wonderfully his oilfactories were overloaded. Or how cute she looked when asleep in front of the TV or simply breath-takingly gorgeous fully made up for a social function. Harm was just grateful each had their own room, otherwise he would've surely been committed to a mental hospital long before then.

All that didn't leave him without an effect, though. Step by step, even with him fighting it all the way, he'd stopped seeing her through his mental filter that filtered everything but the fact that she was the same age as his former ward, but for who she in reality was: truthfully a young, but **adult** and **mature** woman who was, even more importantly, his **wife.** Which, in fact, made his newly-awakened perception and awareness of her something that is not only natural for a married couple, but also expected (especially by his mother and the General).

Maya was his wife and others expected results of the biological nature from this marriage, yet Harm was still fighting and denying his feelings.

But why, oh why, did....

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TBC - if you show the desire, of course (let me know through a review).


	5. General's Vengeance, part 2 of 2

Well, here it is, as I promised. Am not really satisfied with the last two paragraphs, but nothing better comes to mind.

Thank you all for your reviews, hopefully we'll see each other again.

And remember, be careful out there.

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...he have to be so damn gorgeous?! Maya sighed inaudibly as she watched those pectorals and biceps ripple under the thin, clingy shirt as he wiped off the glass. Harm liked to wear muscle shirts and they didn't really leave much to imagination.

Okay, so she wasn't as hormonally out of control as most girls her age, she'd always been a bit too serious and mature for her age, making her somewhat of an outsider in the past, but this man... this man just caused something unknown inside her to come to life. She didn't know what or even if it was good or bad, but it was what had inspired her to become a contestant in that weird competition the General cooked up.

Even now, a year later and married to the main prize, she still couldn't believe that had actually happened, that something like a CO choosing his subordinate officer a wife through a drawing of names is actually possible. Yet, it had happened and she was here now, in her kitchen, in _their _ kitchen, in _their _house, with her _husband._

And all because she'd done something completely unlike her, something she couldn't even understand why she'd done it, it was simply so out of character for her. She wasn't the type to throw herself at men or go on prowls for them, in fact when her cousin had told her about Spring Break at College and what happens there, the only way she felt about it was that she'd been apalled and dismayed at such a behaviour, she certainly hadn't been envious or wanted to engage in it herself. In High School boys and girls alike had called her the Ice Queen, the Spinster and many other derogatory words, just because unlike them she had good morals and because she hadn't wanted anything to do with guys like them.

But Harm... he was different. Different from other officers. In fact, he was the only officer who'd noticed she was new the first day she was assigned at the HQ and welcomed her to her new/first posting and made it clear that if she had questions or problems his door was always open for her. Other officers didn't notice or didn't care. Or both. Much less had they offered her help.

Okay, so she'd later found out he was friendly and helpful to other enlisted as well, contrary to others with commissions, not just her, but he had still made her feel appreciated and noticed, not invisible or a second class citizen as enlisted usually are to too many officers. He was also the only senior officer ever seen conversing with an enlisted, without barking orders. There aren't many like that around. Just because he had bars on his sleeves and not chevrons he didn't believe he was better than them. That alone made him special. He was also different from other men she'd met. Okay, so until she'd joined the Navy she'd only had dealings with boys and... well... Anyway, Harm was different. He respected her, valued her, valued her opinions, beliefs and feelings on matters; supported her and even on his bad days he never had an angry, offensive or a caustic word for her. She knew he was no angel, she knew he could and had hurt people's feelings, but it seemed like only LtCol MacKenzie had been able to rile him up to that degree and only because she'd always been the first one to draw blood and throw around derogatory names.

Maya wasn't a mere Seaman through a lack of intelligence or anything like that, the reason she hadn't been able to attend College was a lack of funds. Her parents loved her and tried to give her everything she needed, but unfortunately, as so many other people, they simply didn't have enough money to put her through College and the stipend that should've rightfully been hers had been given to some dumb guy, made up of only muscle and hormones, who's only purpose in life was to chase after a piece of leather. She'd heard of the military sponsoring talented service members and putting them through College and she'd hoped she would prove herself enough to be given that honor, that's why she'd joined the Navy. At least by joining the military she could do something with her life, achieve more with her level of education than she could in the civilian world.

But then she'd met Harm and her life had taken a completely different destination altogether, without her even knowing it. Yet to show just how convulted, twisty, unpredictable and full of surprises the path of life is, through meeting Harm and becoming his wife she had received the chance to go for her potential. It hadn't taken Harm more than a few days to realize Maya's true potential. Her protests that it was too expensive or that he shouldn't waste money on her, especially not so much, had fallen on deaf ears. Harm's stubborn determination to let Maya achieve her full potential resulted in him giving her a gift of such magnitude only her parents had ever been able to compete with it: Maya was now a college student. And for the first time in her life she was the envy of her classmates: there were not just a few girls who were green with envy over Maya being in a relationship with such a hunk and of her status as a Captain's wife.

The female students weren't the only ones who envied Maya and even secretly cursed her. The Officers' Wives Club was another example. Maya wasn't sure she had ever before encountered such a poisonuous nest of vipers. The hierarchy was set even stricter than in the military and she was even hated by a few for her position as the President of the club. Not all of them were bad, but those that were, were _very_ bad. That didn't mean she hadn't made friends there, because she got on pretty well with some and a few of the older wives had been very helpful and nice to her. No matter where you go you find good people and bad people, the Club was no different. She knew many people looked upon she and Harm with disapproval, not even his former ward was a fan of their marriage.

Mattie... that was a tough situation. The court hadn't given the Rabbs custody over the girl, had questioned their marriage, claiming it was a marriage of convenience. Okay, so it was a marriage of convenience, but not in the way and from a reason they believed. Another matter of contention was Harm's and Maya's imminent moving and that to another country, another continent over the ocean even. The failed custody appeal had strained Harm's and his former ward'ss relationship almost to the breaking point and it hadn't recovered, not even after Harm had hunted down Mattie's father before he'd left for London and, with a combination of tough love and pure violence, straightened the man out and put him back on the wagon so he could at least begin to take care of his daughter. To date Mattie still refused to be the one to initiate the contact and whenever Harm called her replies were always monosyllabic, so sour was she over his transfer and his marriage to Maya. Neither Harm nor Maya knew whether Mattie's disposition was because she felt Maya had taken Harm away from her and now had all of his attention, or because Maya was only 4 years older or because she wasn't Mac - for a reason neither Harm nor Maya understood Mattie was very fond of Mac, even though they had seen each other only 5 times in the span of a year and a half and even after everything Mac had inflicted upon Mattie's guardian.

Though there were these and other tensions, all pushed on them by outsiders, their marriage was pretty good and the Rabbs were as happy as they could be.

It was amazing that something she hadn't been so sure of, something she'd done on an impulse, had turned into something so extraordinary she simply couldn't believe her good fortune and sometimes caught herself wondering when this dream would end.

Her husbandhad from the moment she'd seen him at HQ stirred in her something she'd never felt before in such intensity, a feeling of protectiveness, caring and even, to a small extent, of belonging.

That was the reason she'd put in her "application" when she'd caught wind of the General's plan. She hadn't actually believed she had a chance of being selected, but after getting to know some of the other women at HQ she knew he would be safer with her than with them.

And now... well... she wasn't so sure he was safe with her either. Over the last year she'd become emotionally attached to him and after having come to like him with how he was at work, after getting to know him so much better through everyday life by living with him, she'd committed the damndest thing: she'd fallen in love with her husband.

Sure, the age difference made her a bit uncomfortable, but she'd come to realize that when it's an honest, real love and not just some infatuation or raging hormones, the age gap is trivial.

Looking up at Harm again she was sure her feelings were put on display in her eyes, but he was too busy cleaning up to notice.

Watching him close the cabinet and hang up the dish-towel she decided. Today was the day, today her husband would get to find out Hopefully her more-revealing-than-she-was-used-to-wearing wardrobe of the last several months had done the trick and he now saw her the way she wanted him to regard her: as a woman, a desirable woman, who was his wife, and nothing else, certainly not someone of the same age as his former ward.

Softly calling out his name she waited for him to turn around then shocked the pants off of him when she launched herself into his arms, taking his lips hungrily in an unprecented case of aggressiveness and boldness.

Persisting even with his lack of reaction due to surprise she was a minute later rewarded with his hesitant response. When he picked her up and started making his way to his bedroom it was clear to both of them that from this moment on this marriage would be a real marriage, no longer just a mere business deal.

And with her last coherent thought Maya swore she would make sure it would never end.

**Reviews are love.**


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